If Tattle Tongue Were Real

My kids recently approached me and asked me if “tattle tongue” was real. I laughed so hard! Even though I did not know that there is an actual book about this, I remembered my dad sharing a story with me when I was a teenager.  When he was younger, a teacher (also possibly a nun) was trying to determine which child, among a group of young boys, was not being truthful. She told the boys that whoever is lying will have a black dot on their tongue and then proceeded to ask the boys to stick out their tongues. In theory, the one who is not being truthful will keep from sticking his tongue out and subsequently will give himself away. 

When thinking about going through court for the trauma experienced with domestic violence, the unfortunate reality is the process lasts much longer than it should and all of it is grueling. One of the many reasons I, and others, hesitate to leave an abusive relationship is we know what type of person we will have to face in court. For me, I knew what he did to me. I knew what he was capable of. I saw the crumbling of all his meaningful relationships with family and friends. I watched what he did to many other innocent people that he deemed an enemy, despite their earnest desire to help him. That itself makes it seem like an impossible feat because abusers operate behind closed doors where their victims are most vulnerable. Because of this, we are often only able to provide a miniscule amount of evidence for our cases.

Through my family court battle, I often felt disappointed in myself that I didn’t have all the evidence I could have had. Because I had to leave secretly and abruptly for the safety of my children and me, we had to leave all our belongings behind. For the past 2 and a half years since my escape, it often felt like I was in a “he said, she said” type situation. But, as my attorney encouraged me from day one, time will always reveal the character. I have prayed fervently for God to reveal the truth and prayed for wisdom for all those involved in the justice system and anyone involved with my children… and He has remained faithful. 

Though the enemy will try to scheme and plot for our destruction, God reveals the truth. Again, it may not be in the timing we want, but it will always be revealed in God’s perfect timing.  For the entirety of the court process I have had to face in order to obtain the freedom and protection from my abuser, I have not had to do a single thing, but stand on the truth. And I would take this and any persecution any day over being the one trying to hide the black dot on the tongue. So, throughout the process of family court and even criminal court for those who also faced physical and/or sexual abuse, stand firm and hold your head high that you stand on the truth and remain under God’s protection and promises for the truth to be revealed. There is freedom in the truth and I will boldly take it one step further… for someone who has been abusive in the past and/ or is still walking in abusive behaviors to someone, there is still freedom for you to walk in the truth, but you first have to admit what you have done and what you are continuing to do… 

“And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

-John 8:32